HELLS_MoNkEy   London The future's so bright, well I'd look ahead, but it burns my retinas WARNING: If you visit my page and don't vote in my poll, there is a strong possibilty that your face will fall off!!! BTW There are naughty pictures on my page of my pink oboe. If you're that put off (i have quite ugly manhood) then dont continue! It generally stays mostly in the modtracker though, so shouldnt be much in diary entries :] 7,263 Faces have fallen off I think i'll do one of thse IAM lists IAM: Tom IAM: Male IAM: A Loner IAM: Quite boring IAM: 20 IAM: Modblogged IAM: Mostly into metal and heavier rock, but will listen to anything if its good, regardless of genre IAM: Pretending IAM: And excessive user of smilies ^_^ :-\ -.- MODS 10mm Lobe 10mm Lobe 22mm Lobe (scalpeled to 12mm from nothing) 6mm Labret (Was 16mm) 16mm Septum 3.2mm Helix 10mm Outer conch (Punched at 8mm) Single 1.6mm Transverse lobe through two 10mm tunnels (DIY) Biomechanical Chest piece 1x Skin Divers Lingual Frenectomy (Complete removal of the entire tongue web)+ Second attempt for removal of regrowth Branding on left middle finger BCR subdermal on right hand Past Mods 4mm Frenum (DIY) 3x 2.4mm Frenum (DIY) 1.6mm Scaffold 1.6mm Madison Second 1.6mm Madison 12mm Lobe 5mm Helix 2mm scrotal (DIY) Right side of neck microdermal (DIY Removal) 2x 1.6mm Custom Transverse Lobes 3.2mm Scrotal (DIY) Wrist surface Left neck microdermal 1.6mm Bridge 1.6mm Reverse Navel (DIY) I hang around and moderate the forums on BodyJewelleryShop. Check them out, they rock. People I like Sweep! =D rockettpunk Motherfreaky Magician skip angelicfruitcake DodgySheep Tetsuo DeadTomato Thinks I smell :P adazewa The most recent picture of me on here Looking like shit  Which of your nuts/boobs hangs lowest? Male - Left testicle hangs lower than the right Male - Right testicle hangs lower than the left Female - Left boob is lower than the right Female - Right boob is lower than the left View Results

Bits and Bobs Piercings 16mm Septum Fun . My tattoo Healed up.: Closer look :-)

Should I?

2009/10/14 03:05 I kind of want to go ahead and get my PA done. Now I dont have a missus to worry about. However, I had an STD test today (just as a precaution surrounding the nature of my recent break up) and it fucking STUNG. Now is that just because they were deliberately scraping the inside of my urethra, or is it a good sign I wouldn't enjoy a PA? I've got a long stint of work coming up. I think it works out as 12 nights followed by 5 days followed by 2 nights without a break. Gonna discuss things with my manager and try to escape some of it. I really need to go out and flirt with some pretty ladies. Not sleep with them or anything (though I'm awfully lonely....haha) but just to try and feel attractive again. I had one thing in life that made me feel awesome about my looks and my body, but now its gone. Nobody to worship my generally boring body. Huff. Post/View Comments (5)

I'm feeling a bit better now.

2009/10/07 02:14 I feel better now. I've seen my ex once and called her once, but wont be contacting her again. I pity her, I'm not angry anymore. She feels such hatred for herself, such self loathing that has led to this. She's a mess. Quite honestly, its hard to explain to people on the outside, but I want life to be good to her. Its all the fucked up shit she's been through which makes her so hateful of herself, which causes behaviour like that which destroyed us. I want the cycle broken, so she can be a great person, because I know how amazing she can be when she puts her mind to it. We knew we'd break up soon, but were both too cowardly to do it. Last time we broke up, we got back together and the same would have happened this time, which is why she had a meaningless fling. It set the whole thing in stone. If we just broke up, we'd be back together in no time, just tolerating each other again. That doesn't excuse what she did, but seeing that she hates that she has degraded herself by that act has made me realise thats punishment enough. She'll spend longer getting over that than I will getting over the split. And I've never seen her as wrecked as she is now. She wants to change so much, because she knows she cant go on like this. She's just booked a flight to Peru for the end of January and will go to teach children to speak English for a while, so she can grow up. I hope she realises her worth, because then she will become the amazing person I fell in love with and be happy again, albeit without me. She cant change here, with her crap friends, her crap mum, and her lovely sister and grandparents who cant be there for her. I like to think one day in the long distant future we might be friends though. I dont hate her for what she's done. In fact, I've forgiven her through understanding. And I hope things work out well for her, but that she manages to change herself. This will all be best for both of us in the long run. Of course if I'm never able to look at her without wishing to be with her, then it cant happen, but I'll keep an open mind for friendship when we're over this mess. We always said that we wished to remain friends, because we were always best friends. This situation could change that, but I don't want it too. So long as she changes, and makes this mess up to me by being the best friend she could ever be if it does go that way. In return she'll find a great friend in me. Its strange, because I never thought I'd feel this well about it all. Even though I feel better, I still cant sleep or eat well yet, though that will fix. I'm glad I do feel this way though, because it means I can look back on our time fondly, rather than with anger. And whilst things were never so good recently, my god she gave me the best times I've ever had. Post/View Comments (3)

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